How was 2012?

And His Name is Luke.

Dear Online Diary,

Should I believe in the power of dreams? There are times when I feel like a dream was real. At some point, I was thinking that this could be possible. That these things I am seeing, are premonitions of my inherited mind.

Yea. I must be insane.

I am sure though, that all my sanity's intact.

But there are dreams so lucid. That makes me feel like that that was reality.

Over the past weeks, I am seeing this man in my dreams. He felt so real.

We were super friends in my dreams. It felt like he came in perfect timing. Gahd! I wish he's real. I need him now. I need a friend like him. Or maybe a brother. With all these things I'm going through, I need that comfort he gives me in my dreams. Basta, I just feel like that man's going to be part of my life.

Si God na ba itey? lol

I am very certain that that setting isn't in Manila. Probably it's in the South.  Cagayan or Davao or Cebu maybe. (Somewhere malinis. lol) Or maybe even outside Pinas. (As if I have plans of travelling outside the country! Duh!).

And I cannot see his face. My dreams were all full of emotions. You know how magulo some dreams are. Scenes shift from one setting to another. I find them difficult to describe.

I am not expecting him to be a lover. Maybe a friend, a very very good friend. Sige na nga. Pwede na ding lover. lol

Ang hirap naman kase I-explain. He makes me feel very loved and wanted but there are scenes in my dreams where it shows me his family. A wife and a kid.

(Kaloka. Ayoko naman maging third party, anebeh! I will never be a kabit. I have been a victim of this and I wouldn't want another woman, another family to go through the same hell I've gone through. )

I was on my way to work last night, and the thoughts about these dreams keep bugging me. And a name popped up. His name is Luke.

I know now. His name is Luke!

Luke, I have a lot to thank you for. Thank you for coming into my life, unexpectedly, but just in time. Thank you for helping me move on.

I will never have the chance to tell you these things. But I sincerely hope you'll feel my gratefulness for these random things I can mention--

>>> for listening when I try to work out details.

I appreciate it when you take time to listen and pay attention, while letting me speak.

>>> for almost always handing me a napkin when I cry. :D

>>> for not judging me for my weaknesses.

>>> for helping me understand life, and love.

>>> for giving me the room where I can be just me.

If you only knew... I get giddy giggles when you tell me I'm hot despite this chest and flabby arms. lol

Thank you

>>> for making me feel beautiful even when i'm in a skimpy pair of old jeans and sneakers.

>>> for always wishing me a good day.

I appreciate it when you ask how my kids are doing.

Thank you

>>> for the meaningful conversations.

>>> for your company, when I shirk from the bitterness of the real world.

>>> for sharing me things I never have experienced in my life.

>>> for the secret solitude.

>>> for finding time to meet me even on gloomy days or nights.

Thank you for reminding me my worth.

Thank you for believing that I am strong.

Years from now, I believe I'll come across this post again. That's why I wrote this online.

If I ever get a chance to meet you, Luke. I want to give you my tightest hug. Thank you for easing my pain. I don't know you yet. But maybe someday we'll meet.

Maybe someday. :)

Red Wine for Wednesday!

Who's bringing home a bottle of wine this wed?

This was the original text:

When I lost my marriage last year, I thought it would be the end of the world and I wasted so much energy on mourning.

This year, I was in search of happiness in the form of a person who'd be dedicated to me, someone who'd be romantic and would make me feel special and beautiful. I wanted to be put upon a pedestal and be worshipped as the goddess I pretend to be. I wanted to know what it was like to be cherished, and experience things I've never had in my life.

Then I found a person who cared about me. And I knew him for more than a decade! When I am with this person, I'm at the top of the ferris wheel-- high above the chaos of life! We hide out in a secret solitude which insulates us, momentarily, from the real world and all its troubles. For the first time in my life, I found someone who wouldn't judge me for my weaknesses, someone who listens as I work out details, asks me questions to help flesh out plans, and helps me understand life, and love.  I was given the room where I can be just me. I felt something strong and deep, and my life was filled with joy, beyond anything I can write.

It dawned upon me... Isn't that the dynamics of what marriage was supposed to be? Why have I found this just now, in a place and situation where we both can't move forward?

Giddy giggles and twittering butterflies made me feel alive. I knew I was happy, but I feel the need to poison the situation, because I am aware that it isn't right. I was happy, but I am hurting somebody. If I am gaining this bliss to the expense of others, then it's wrong.

I knew I became a better person for opening my heart and life to another. For a very short time, I have probably escaped from the reality of my lost marriage. But I had to leave now. And I did. I have a relationship to fix now. I'll be even better if I choose to decide to be happy regardless of whatever life has for me, with or without a person that could fulfill my idea of such happiness. I shouldn't be pinning this to someone else and I shouldn't be compromising somebody else's happiness for mine.

I am making the right decision this time. So this Christmas, all I wish for is a Happy Heart-- for me and for the people around me. Now I've decided to be happy, and I will be.

Can you still spare me this wish, Santa? I was probably naughty, but I am striving to be nice.

Well, congrats dearie!

Xoxo,

Allson and Allison's Wonderpets + Hi-5 Partey 2012

This year was the easiest, most hassle-free, budget-friendly birthday preparation i ever had for the kids.

I got two 8" round cakes from Cakes and Memories (fellow moms from the South knew for sure how terrible this bakeshop's customer service was-- [past tense, ok?], nevertheless, i  got my cakes from them. the frugal mommy i am. their moist chocolate caramel cakes are superb, i just can't resist it!)
An 8" round cake would be enough to cover my kids' blowcakes. I got 2 of them. They won't be the star of the event anyway as we were holding the celeb at a play place. The kids might just ignore the cakes.

I got about 2 dozen balloons prepped for their mini party. Was expecting around 20 kiddie guests-- that's about 9 from allison's class (they're 19 in class  but i thought only nearly half would make it to Rob), 3 brats from the neighborhood, a nephew, and 6 officemate kids.

The initial plan was to get 2 cakes from C&M and order a giant pizza from, where else??? Pizza Hut of course! :D But Pizza Hut Robinson's Place Dasma and eve SM Dasma is not serving the giant one anymore. So I crossed it out from my planner. Will have to get trays of pasta from a friend then. Oh, jeez. this reminds me of Hannah. I miss her. :) Moving on, the plans weren't realized as I was very busy a few days before the kids' celebration. I was not even able to print out a peg for Allson's Wonderpets cake. I just gave the C&M staff a cutout of the wonderpets logo so they can make a gumpaste that would look like it.
Bought 3 boxes of Country Style crazy squares, logs and twists, 2 cases of C2, some candies and gums, and 2 dozens of non-woven mini bags (for the looties). Did an Art Attack for some Hi-5 hands, Jupjup artsys, and WOnderpets logos from spare construction paper we have at the office. Tagged some facebook friends on an e-invite, printed out a few invitations for Allison's classmates and the neighborhood kids, and texted my closest friends and relatives. This would do, I guess.

Come after shift, November 13, rushed from the office to the bakeshop to pick up the cakes.

Allson's Wonderpets Cake was very plain and dull. I even had a slight argument with the staff on how the gumpaste logo turned out to be. They didn't make a blue border for the red W on the yellow gumpaste. It didn't look like Wonderpets'! So we bought some candy-coated chocolates (mini Nips, to be specific), opened about 14 packets to collect blue candy-coats to complete the blue border for the Wonderpets logo. Added dots of red and yellow candies over the little cake, and voila! My efforts brought some life to the little blowcake!

Allison's Hi-5 cake was topperless. I was sleepless for several days contemplating on what to do with it. It has to resemble at least a bit of the Hi-5 theme. That morning, I thought of borrowing Tita Ginny's picture stand (a piece I have commissioned JenClaymaster to make for Ginny on her 27th birthday) as it resembles some color as the base cake I've ordered. Didn't realize it can do the trick. Here's what happened:

Not bad, uh?

Now we move on to the party. There was no program or anything. We just let the kids rule the floor. Set a Hi-5 and Wonderpets dvd playing at the background, and there you go...

The three hours were well-spent. It was a fantastic way to celebrate my kids birthdays, with this age range.

I told you, it was hassle-free.

Here's Allson's Tarp--

The Loot Bag Contents (Gums and Candies)--

 

The Invites-- 

Oh, let me share with you the peso powers. You won't believe it!

Action Station 3hour exclusivity-- 4,500 powers
8" Round Cakes from Cakes and Memories @485ea-- 970 powers
24 balloons on stick @13ea-- 312 powers

Mushroom Pasta Trays (serves 30) -- 700 powers
Country Style Doughnuts disc @20ea-- 720 powers
C2 Solo x 2cases @7.75/bottle-- 372 powers
Candies and Gums-- 500 powers
Non-woven bags @12ea--  288 powers
Allson's 3x4 tarpaulin-- 180 powers
Invites @4.75ea-- 114 powers

What have I not included? Oh, the gas to and fro, mobile phone talktime, and miscellaneous ones... :)

Wonder Pets + Hi-5 Party Preps 2012

Here we go again with a short-planned party. I have already made arrangements with Action Station Robinson's Place Dasma for my little boy's party venue last September. I just needed to scrump up a few details for his Wonder Pets inspired celebration.

Here are some pegs:

My greatest thanks to my bff for the invitation layout:

And here's Ate Allison's very simple invite:

And her pegs:

Credits ti the owner of these. :)

2 weeks to go! We'll print the invites later and give them out soon. Weee weee weee... Can't wait!!


Xoxo,

Lalai

Multi- Sanostol

Lia sent me a packet with a few bottles of multivitamins.  It seemed like a trial pack for several brands. LOL The frst few bottles were known brands in the market. I'll take some time reviewing them soon. Now the last one we opened was this multi-sanostol, which, according to Allison, was the best tasting of all:

Here's a peek of the NF:

Will this be available in the Philippine market soon? Well, sana nga.


Xoxo,

Lalai

Top of the Grocer List

What I needed to buy every 10 days:

My Chevron Racer Pen

I got a little treat from Anj today...

image credits: chevronstore.com

A Chevron Racer Pen!

It's a balck ballpoint, click action pen, in the figure of a racer car which really moves. I'm sure my dearest Allson will love this.

Thanks Anj, thanks Chevron! LOL

Xoxo,

Lalai

My ID Checklist :D

My Company ID. For Last Name Update. My SSS Card. For Last Name Update.
My Pag-ibig HDMF ID. For Last Name Update.
My Passport. For Last Name Update. Expiring this year, too!
My Voter's ID.
My Driver's License.
My Philhealth Card. Updated. Check!

Party Preps 2012!

Some party ideas for my dearest little coocoo boy:

And Ate Allison who's turning Hi-5!:

Some Legal Issues I Need to Take Care Of

At one point, it seemed like I gave up on the issue. I though it would only be a waste of money, time and effort.  I had second thoughts of pushing it through now.  I realized it will evetually be worth all these. I will forever be grateful to whoever wrote this blog.

I need to take actions now. For my kids' welfare.

Assessment First...

Before pushing through with an initiative like that I've mentioned from my previous entry, I'll strike at a needs assessment first. I hope I can get responses to compare feedback from internal and external respondents.

Feel free to participate in this survey in case you resonate with me. LOL


TIA!

xoxo,

Lalai

A Child Care Facility, How About That??

I would love to be an at home mom to my 3 wonderful kids 24/7 without any complaints. But of course, being a single mom is tough. I had to work for us to live, which will make this ideal, very impossible. I'm just a little lucky that I can at least leave the kids with my 67-year old mom at night while I'm at work. I know how difficult it is for her to take care of these kiddoes while I'm away. But things would probably still work better if i had somebody to look after them while I'm at work, when mom's not around, or when the nanny stows away again. 

Like me, most of my friends and colleague moms do not have yayas to look after our children. Nannies have become increasingly difficult to find and sometimes when we do have one, we find it hard to trust them with our kids. There would also be instances when our nannies would have their own emergencies and we’re left with no choice but to call in and miss our shifts. I’m thinking… Parent employees like us need a back-up facility when there's nobody to attend to our kids. I wish my employer would have such facility in the office to accommodate this need.

The idea of having an amenity in GEMSPI like a next-door/ in-house child care center where working parents can deposit their children before their shifts, drop by them during breaks can boost productivity since we do not need to call in sick to attend to our kids and become more settled with the thought that our kids are just next door.





ABC & Me Childcare image credits: The New York Times


Since we do graveyard, odd shifts and non-standard hours, the need would probably be a night care center. Instead of the traditional day care center, the concept would be a child care center like that of ABC & Me Childcare.
GE can benefit from this as the idea projects reduced turnover, increased productivity and fewer unscheduled days off. Aside from GEMSPI's [already] promising benefits, this can be another edge for the company in hiring the best talents and can also encourage female employees to return to work after having children. It is a great benefit for us, female employees and (aside from SIP), will make it difficult for us to leave the company.:)

I hope the people behind GE Women's Network resonate with this. :)

My Birthday Wishlist =)

Let me share with you my very simple birthday wishlist:

Nenuco. Gap So Pink. To relive my olfactory mem'ries.
A pair of canvess sneakers.
And a happy puso.

Happy 25th birthday to me! =)

I'm Back!

It's been a while since my last entry. A lot has happened. A lot has change. And I'm back now.:)

For good.:)


xoxo

Waiting for Lorin Amethyst

I am supposed to be due by 02.29.2012 :)

But my baby girl has not come out yet. We are all waiting for you, dearest one. And we're so excited!

Preparing for Baby#3 :)

We are expecting another bundle of joy to arrive in about 4 weeks.  So far, I am doing the online shopping stuff for frugal buys.

So far, here's what we have for the layette:


And the gears we have as of this blog's  posting:

• Ashworthy Stroller (Kuya Allson's pre-loved)
• Jolly Playpen (Kuya Allson's pre-loved)

And here's what I am hunting for online now:

Gerber GentleFlow Feeding Bottles 8oz, 3's

Best Buy of the Day!

Passed by the fruit stand right across the shuttle terminal in Kadiwa and bought five dainty lakatan bananas for only 5 peso powers!

Imagine, 5 pesos for 5 potassium boosters! What a buy!:))